Wellness Part One
Venus flytraps, Huntington Garden, 2006.
I laid Miles down for a nap and came downstairs, scooped out some mint and chip, dumped a bunch of milk on top, grabbed my notebook and ran into the office. I had to kick a tiny maraca out of the way in order to sit down at my desk, stepping on a cheerio once I did.
My office is a small junk antique table in a half sized bedroom (*right*) that used to contain the baby's crib. We have since moved it upstairs in our room (since he actually has to use it occasionally now), replacing the co-sleeper that he grew out of, and now I share this space with his bookshelf, dresser and supplies. I am thrilled to have a door between me and the rest of the herd! Sheesh.
Work. It is a thing I love to do. I am just beginning to reinvent what I do. Miles will be a year old in a couple of weeks and I'm anxious to simplify my work life so that my time with him is extraordinary, but that I also set aside 12 or so hours a week to pursue my enterprise. This leads me to my next thought:
I am surrounded extraordinary women eager to share their stories and skills of wellness of some kind. You are bodyworkers, feng shui-ers, health food store owners, therapists, shamanic healers, writers of motherhood and the human experience, artists with immense hearts, 12 step sponsors, yoga teachers, coaches, home organizers, nature enthusiasts, ecopsychologists, herbalists, sex therapists, child advocates, vegetarians, energy healers, retreat facilitators and so many more. You amaze me!
I want to talk about what this category of wellness represents for us. Why do we have such a strong drive to be WELL and want wellness for others?
Who are we?
What do we have in common and how do we talk about the incredible gifts that we have to offer with each other?
What holds us back and what thrusts us forward?
Spill!
posted by pinkcoyote at
9/11/2006 03:37:00 PM
4 Comments:
Wow....where to start? I love the way you challenge your readers to put on their Pooh caps and think think think.
For me, the 12 Step sponsor, wellness was given to me as a gift and I have been told that I must give back what I was so freely given. It isn't a tall order for me, it is an honor. When I see my own former sad, angry, lost, and desperate heart mirrored in the newcomers face, or any woman in pain or sadness, I want her to experience the same healing. I want her to feel the gift of inner peace and wellness. I want to give my gift away because I know that it enriches my own heart to help heal a wounded one. I want her to know that she need never be alone and that she has worth. Once she has wellness, she can pay it forward.
I heard someone share recently about a nature program they had seen on female elephants and how they surround an ailing or injured female member of the herd so she won't fall or lay down, because that would mean certain death for her. They hold her up with their bodies.
Women with wellness are like the female elephants--they want to hold up their troubled sisters until they can stand on their own.
What holds us back and what thrusts us forward?
Holding back... fear... thrusting forward... fear! Finding myself once again in this workspace world which is SOOO not where my desires lay, recently I've realized it is from fear why I stay. I strive to be not the 'perfect mom' ((no further insanity needed!)) However, I do try to create an environment where my children won't leave this home with the same fears I have each day. I truly believe that knowing things about yourself at an early age, believing in them at an early age, will create a strong sense of safety and strength in their lives. And perhaps a bit of daring!! This is what thrusts me forward. My refusal to allow Fear of failure... personal or professional to reign over their lives. Success is born from within. It is nurtured and balanced and well treated. They don't have to be Dr's or Lawyers, Cameron wants to be a break-dancer this week! haha!! And I'll be happy if he's happy. This is why I am right where I am supposed to be at this exact moment.
Oh goodness, you are surrounded by such incredible women! I want to spend more time in your sacred circle.
The kind of wellness I yearn for these days is a deep authenticity...the kind of authenticity that sits strong and calm in the center of my being and guides me with neither coddling nor judgment, but with enough compassion to hold me when I'm self-hateful and enough faith in me to kick me when I'm whining (and the wisdom to know the difference - that's my 12 step reference!).
Wellness means living deep inside myself while interacting with the present moment in a way that feels absolutely honest. It means stretching myself toward the edge of the envelope, and having the ego strength to do it.
What drives me toward this? I don't know, I don't know if I can know. But something about my current age (33) seems to be drawing me to it as if some force inside me has been waiting all these years for me to become aware of it, and now that I have, it will not let me return to ignorance of it. Authenticity is all I want now, and ultimately it is what I want for all my clients as well. I don't see it as my "gift" for them, but I feel that all our healing and growth brings us closer to Who We Really Are, and that is our work every moment.
I'm not one of your regular circle, just a lurker who loves your daily meditations on the sweetness of life. For me, healing has come at great cost, through much suffering and hard work. That thing within that keeps us reaching for the light, for health, for deep wholeness...it is a mystery to me, yet it is clear that it's there and that it is what has thrust me forward over or through every obstacle. Sometimes its just a doggedness, a refusal to believe that this is all, that something incredible isn't right around the corner, or waiting in the next minute. Sometimes it is willed perseverance fueled only by the memory of having gotten through something tough before. Sometimes - rarely for me - it is a pure ecstatic lust for an idea or learning a new technique or a piece of music or...something that makes me come fully alive and grow single-minded in its pursuit. All of it has brought me into contact with people and ideas and art and love and mystery that I would either never have encountered otherwise, or would not have had the soulishness to appreciate. Now I can comfortably say, "it's all good" and know it's true, way down deep.
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