ponder ponder

my first son, hank. we sometimes call him gary. i'm good at pondering overthinking turning the idea this way and that today's notion is no different nibbling away in my brain as i reheat vegetable pie for a real friend ticking tocking quietly as i lie on the fluffy grey flannel in bed with my baby overdue for his nap squiggling around like a snake in a too small basket curling up like corkscrew smoke wondering why, why i wonder why that thing got to be this way and knowing that under all of the wiggling, squiggling, nibbling, quibbling and curling going on in there nothing can make it something it isn't.