tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14694098.post6908508001862345322..comments2023-08-19T01:22:51.863-07:00Comments on The Pink Coyote: Fixatedpinkcoyotehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03139678019016847033noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14694098.post-63446271860767560102007-01-24T10:43:00.000-08:002007-01-24T10:43:00.000-08:00Just wanted to say thanks.. not that it matters or...Just wanted to say thanks.. not that it matters or it should but thanks for always being open and honest whether I agree with everything you believe in doesnt matter. You still have so many qualities that I truly admire<br />Also, thanks for saying things here you haven't said here before.Juliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09670808346725515684noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14694098.post-1448433687953566242007-01-23T23:09:00.000-08:002007-01-23T23:09:00.000-08:00Ally, of course this is the logical argument that ...Ally, of course this is the logical argument that makes the most sense to the rational mind. But when I'm in my pathology (dependent, insecure, controlling) I feel "less than". Because nurturing, teaching, cooking etc, has not been quantified in our culture as being equal to money-earning-work, it is ingrained within me to feel less self-sufficient. Being a SAHM is a vulnerable position which is DEFINITELY what I want for the next few years, but not simple on the mind. Family, by definition I think, can mean all things are equal and in balance though two people are not doing the same things. Getting out of my head and into my heart about it can perhaps guide me. Thank you for prompting me to think more about this! :) ppinkcoyotehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03139678019016847033noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14694098.post-21409600471674713752007-01-22T12:20:00.000-08:002007-01-22T12:20:00.000-08:00oh pixie, i so relate to this. especially the par...oh pixie, i so relate to this. especially the part where you realizes after 13 years of working like a slave for someone else, you couldn't do it anymore. i SO know that feeling having always had a day job to supplement my art income. then one day i too said, "i can't do this anymore. i thought about going back to college and make a career change and every time i got close, the door would close, i.e. no evening classes or lack of funds etc. then someone said to me , "did you ever think that maybe what you're REALLY suppose to be doing is making art". it was painfully obvious.<br /><br />AND the decision to be a SAHM for satch does make me feel unequal and i do feel awkward about spending because i feel like it's not mine to spend. <br /><br />oh you've given me so much to ponder and i adore you for this.<br />xoxoWendyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10071848041740827290noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14694098.post-6800291448461496412007-01-22T10:03:00.000-08:002007-01-22T10:03:00.000-08:00Melissa, I hear ya. I want to believe that I will...Melissa, I hear ya. I want to believe that I will know beyond a shadow of a doubt when Miles is ready to go to a little preschool or something, but I also doubt that will be before he is four years old. My husband and I do a split shift now, where he comes home around 4 and I do by appointment only work beginning any time after that. It helps me to ground myself and air out my need to hang with adults and gives him valuable bonding time for a couple of hours before M's bedtime. We began this at about 8 months, slowly, and I can say with confidence that it was a bit rough on both me and M in the beginning but has worked out really well for us. After the first year, things loosen up a bit. It seems like we are constantly evolving and creating new boundaries for exploration. The very gradual nature of shifting a bit after the first year of bonding and attachment has helped us all immensely!pinkcoyotehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03139678019016847033noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14694098.post-72204398235589467482007-01-22T09:37:00.000-08:002007-01-22T09:37:00.000-08:00Thanks for a link to the research. I'm having my f...Thanks for a link to the research. I'm having my first baby in March and I feel quite conflicted about work -- something I really love doing -- going back, etc. I'm lucky that my husband and I are in a position where I can stay home if I want, but I can't help but feel like I'm battling guilt and questions of self-fulfillment from both sides of the fence I'm riding right now.<br /><br />Also, I really enjoy your blog :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com